A Regency Word a Day Keeps Mundanity Away

Yorkshire Tyke

2010-03-24T07:48:00.000-07:00

Idiots

"Jeff and I were at the game – go Packers! – but a bunch of Yorkshire Clowns dressed as Vikings were right behind us, and kept spilling beer down our Arron Rodgers jerseys. Dude! Party Foul!"

Abram

2010-03-10T07:44:00.000-08:00

Nekkid

"Oh man, this girl I met at the Red Wings game just has me all turned around. I mean, I feel like she totally gets me. Emotionally speaking, it's like, I'm completely abram around her."

Pantler

2010-02-09T05:14:00.000-08:00

Butler

"Jesus, did you see the way Dave has his new intern carrying his lunch around and making him open doors for him? He's treated that poor kid like a total pantler!"

Indorser

2010-02-01T17:41:00.000-08:00

A violent thug

"Before George Foreman was a seller of stove-top grills, he was, in the ring, a most terrifying indorser."

Lansprisado

2010-01-25T06:28:00.000-08:00

Second Fiddle

"Have you been to that new vintage clothing store over on Vine street? There's the cutest girl working there. Problem is she's always got this lansprisado hanging around – this short, scowly brunette – so it's kind of hard for me to work my magic."

Timber Toe

2010-01-21T06:27:00.000-08:00

A Person with a Wooden Leg

"My Uncle Bob lost his leg in a zoo accident; I'd rather not get into the details. But now, when he comes over for holidays, we yell, 'Mom, old Timber Toe is here!'"

Wagtail

2010-01-17T10:22:00.001-08:00

A Lewd Woman

"That Sarah Silverman is awesome. What a wagtail!"

Oil of Gladness

2010-01-15T07:56:00.000-08:00

A Beating

"After I dumped that milkshake on Jim's head, I thought that I'd gotten enough of a jump on him to evade his grasp. But shit, man, he ran me down and poured upon me the oil of gladness. Look at my black eye! Jim is crazy!"

Ware Hawk!

2010-01-12T11:56:00.000-08:00

An exclamation indicating the cops have arrived

"Jackie's party was in full swing, but then, just as I was about to talk to this red-head I'm sweet on, there was a banging at the door. 'Ware Hawk!' Jim yelled, and we all bolted for the back door."

Rantipole

2010-01-11T09:09:00.000-08:00

A Rude Person

"Did you see that Cardinals fan getting in Aaron Rodgers' face last night as he left the stadium? What a frickin' rantipole!"

Sharper

2010-01-10T13:38:00.000-08:00

Pick-Pocket

"In all the annals of American government, there were few sharpers more adept at working the system then the commercial banks."

Peppered

2010-01-09T06:24:00.000-08:00

Diseased with an ailment of the venereal variety

"People like Tiger Woods really ought to be careful with how they spend their leisure hours; if they're not careful they could get peppered."

Pennyworth

2010-01-08T08:34:00.000-08:00

Bargain

"Dude, I got two pork tacos at El Porkos for only two dollars Canadian. What a pennyworth!"

Peculiar

2010-01-07T05:33:00.000-08:00

Mistress

"Tiger Woods, it turned out, had numerous peculiars."

Nescio

2010-01-06T10:52:00.000-08:00

A person playing dumb

"Max knows that I hate plum tomatoes but insists on putting them in our dinner salad. Then I complain, and he throws up his hands and grunts like a total nescio. Aargh!"

Mizzle

2010-01-05T06:29:00.000-08:00

Elope

"In my personal opinion, it's kind of screwed up that John and Jane decided to mizzle, considering that their parents had already dropped a huge deposit to get that ballroom at the Hilton."

Blue Devils

2010-01-04T06:30:00.000-08:00

Melancholy

"Everybody else seems to think snow is pretty, but I tell you, it gives me a fierce case of the blue devils."

Dry Boots

2010-01-02T07:39:00.000-08:00

A sly person. A hustler.

"Anne always seems to be in the right place, at the right time, talking with the right person. There's a reason they call her 'Dry Boots'!"

Cunning Shaver

2009-12-31T06:44:00.000-08:00

An ingenious thief

"I have to give Dex credit for the scam he pulled on that old lady. She's totally convinced he's her long-lost grandson who was supposed to have died in the Gulf War, and now he stands to inherit a fortune. What a cunning shaver!"

Cuddie

2009-12-30T08:53:00.000-08:00

Fool

"Anyone who thinks Drew Brees is going to get the MVP this year is a total cuddie."

Wibble

2009-12-29T10:36:00.000-08:00

A bad drink

"Janet thinks of herself as a real mixmaster, but her latest concoction, The Lacy Eight – consisting of gin, rum, and peppermint schapps – is some serious wibble."

Xantippe

2009-12-28T07:04:00.000-08:00

A pain in the ass

"When we first started dating, Jackie was a whole lot of fun. But now she's always expecting me to have a master plan, and gets annoyed when I ask her what she wants to do. What a total xantippe!"

Wet Parson

2009-12-27T07:27:00.000-08:00

Con Artist

"Janet and Brad are always trying to convince me that their papers are late because of circumstances out of their control. Please! These kids are just a pair of dime-store wet parsons."

Whiddler

2009-12-26T06:27:00.000-08:00

An informer

"If not for the courage of Jack Brown, our fearless whiddler who blended right in with those clowns, we would have never have been able to bust that group of Betel dealers."

The Monosyllable

2009-12-24T05:56:00.000-08:00

Sex

"We've been dating for two months, and all Silas wants to do is take long walks and cuddle. If we don't do the monosyllable soon, I'm gonna go out of my mind!"

Pogy

2009-12-23T06:47:00.000-08:00

Drunkie

"Janet and Evan came to the Christmas party as Jane Eyre and Rochester, and got tres pogy; within an hour they'd monopolized the misteltoe. Life at Thornfield Hall must be hot!"

Mill Twig

2009-12-22T06:32:00.000-08:00

A Shirt

"Sam is always using words that no one understands, and it's getting annoying. Like, last night, we were at the bar, and he turned to Bob, motioned to his shirt, and said, 'That's quite a nice mill twig you're sporting.' Jesus, dude, do you have any idea how pretentious you sound?"

Daint

2009-12-21T05:44:00.000-08:00

A person of particular tastes and uptight behavior

"Jim brought his boyfriend home for Christmas. He was all right, but man, what a daint! He wouldn't eat oysters because, and I quote, 'They're squishy,' and when the dog came in covered in snow he almost ran to the other side of the room. Why can't Jim find someone we can actually be excited about?"

Loaf

2009-12-20T07:57:00.000-08:00

A Problematic Situation. A Serious Quandary.

"When I saw the skunk charging at me, looking like I'd wronged him for the last time, I thought, Man, I am in a truly bad loaf."

Jarkman

2009-12-19T06:01:00.000-08:00

A person who makes fake IDs

"Danny, Jane, and I went across town to see Admiral Jake, a jarkman whose work is flawless, but when we knocked on the door, he shooed us off. 'My crazy cop uncle is here,' he said, still in his robe even though it was past noon. 'Get out of here or I'm gonna get busted.'"

Deady

2009-12-18T06:37:00.000-08:00

Gin

"When she told me her favorite deady was Bombay Sapphire, I knew this was gonna be a great first date. 'Two deadys and tonic!' I yelled to the bartender, who obliged with a wink."

Janizaries

2009-12-17T05:43:00.000-08:00

A Mob. A Riotous Rabble.

"We rushed over to Ben and Jerry's to get a free sample of their new ice cream, Coconut Creampuff. But the scene got ugly when they ran out of said samples, and the crowd, already low on blood sugar, turned into a bunch of janizaries, yelling "Shame on you, Ben!" and "How do you sleep, Jerry?"

Fire Shovel

2009-12-16T05:31:00.000-08:00

A Person Who Likes to Talk. A Lot.

"Could someone please talk with Jeannie about her behavior at keggers? I swear, once she gets a few in her she's a regular fire shovel, and no one else can get a word in edgewise. Everyone looks at me like, She's your sister, dude, do something, but at this point I'm too busy standing ramboyle over my reputation."

(the) Fun

2009-12-15T06:17:00.000-08:00

Male Reproductive Organs

"Dude, organic chemistry is so hard; it's just got me by the fun!"

Cag Magg

2009-12-14T05:27:00.000-08:00

Bits and Scraps of Food: Leftovers of Leftovers.

"I opened up the fridge, and it wasn't pretty: a turkey leg, last week's mac-and-cheese, and a half-empty bottle of Budweiser. Serious cag magg. But nothing a little salt can't fix."

Gotch-Gutted

2009-12-13T06:58:00.000-08:00

Pot-Bellied.

"Have you seen Greg since Christmas? He's really leading with his stomach after all that yuletide pie; dude is truly gotch-gutted!"

French Leave

2009-12-12T06:57:00.000-08:00

To Run from Your Creditors.

"We went looking for Danny Baxter, who owed Mr. Hank two grand. We were gonna put the screws to him, but that wily fucker had gone on French Leave; knowing Danny and what a snowbird he is, I'm gonna bet that he's in Miami. We'll find him sooner or later."

Sapscull

2009-12-11T05:51:00.000-08:00

A Simpleton. A Dummy.

"Watching you try to get one side of the Rubik's Cube was really something. I was like, man, what a sapscull."

Double Jugg

2009-12-10T05:17:00.000-08:00

A man's derriere.

"Jim was the least talented member of the band; instead of musical ability, he was mainly known for his high-water double jugg, and the way he shook it onstage."

Bantling

2009-12-09T05:21:00.000-08:00

A young child.

In the positive:

"Well if that isn't the cutest little bantling I've ever seen!"

In the negative:

"You know, when you complain about getting your license revoked for doing a hundred in a fifty-five, you sound like a total bantling."

Rumboyle

2009-12-08T04:59:00.000-08:00

To be on watch.

"Stealing the beer from the party was easy. Dan diverted the host, and I stood rumboyle in the kitchen while Jane loaded up the bag with Miller Lite."

Marplot

2009-12-07T05:37:00.000-08:00

A Spoilsport. A Killjoy. A Buzzkill.

"We were having a great time watching the Vikings-Packers game, but then Bob had to be a complete marplot by complaining about how Brett Favre has no accuracy left with the long ball."

Affidavit Men

2009-12-06T06:30:00.000-08:00

False witnesses who will say anything on the stand for money. Also known as "Knights of the Post."

Example: "Dude, I was sure I would get away with stealing that Camaro off the lot, but the owner of the dealership hired some affadavit men to say they saw me gunning out of there, and now I'm flat busted!"